Race 7
For the sake of my readership, growing by the decade, I have published a small bibliography of many of the Sonatas and crews so you may follow these semen and their progress towards honour, fame and, dare I say, immorality.
“Deare reader the fcene is fet upon this dreadful tide ‘o travefty. Nefer in the anulls of yakting has fuche bafe privilege been unspanikerd. Twas fucke a knight did fair Thermoploea set a cloud o’ sail in the East India’s to beat the fabulous Cutty Fark across the wide oceans os India an wilde Atlantic to port in fiaer London town for the joy of profiding tea to the Cabinet of Elizabeth’s humble savants.” That’s enough Ed.
Never the less this was a quite dramatic night and the best yet in the caldron of Sonata World’s. My match report is somewhat distorted by having to remember most of it as my biro was stuffed where the ‘sun don’t shine’ in the court room of the RO after the race. From memory this is how the night went…….
Light winds filtered out of Brixham - home to the Sonata World Fleet assembled to win the coveted trophy. Most of the also-rans were clipping up and down the line jockeying for places or filling in P45s, filing expenses and e-mailing lawyers.
The wind section had a ripping start by Battery Point and fell into the trap of a luffing match leaving the field free for ToyotaYaris 1.4i and apiano to fight out a dual to the end of the breakwater and get into an unassailable position. ( usually they have proved how easy it is loose from such a grand start).
Blues Breaker had trouble dropping a kite before rounding up
and starting on course side. They are no rookies having Simon and a prile of lasses on board – one is sufficient for legality
but these guys always overdo everything – 3 grils including
a Fastnet Laser sailor – I’ve done the Fastnet in a 60 footer and, believe me, any
one who does this in a Laser gets my vote – her name is Rebecca but I’ve not
yet been able to get an interview so that’s all I know. Apiano! Had one statutory
lass on board because Robin Smith’s sex-change has not yet healed up and he has
still to work on his shaving n’ tan n’ panty line. Jane Silver, guest crew on
apiano! is from Bolton and any one from
Soon it became clear that, with the threats from Yaris and “R” over, the tussle was to be between Blues Breaker and apiano! The first mark F was rounded and in characteristic style apiano waited for Blues to catch up by launching a kite on the wrong side. Alto (3rd in series) was simply not visible and a fellow reporter told me the crew were were so late to board they went on any old boat that would take them…..
From the windward mark two tactics were adopted and neither paid till the death at D. apiano! soared high upwind for speed and Blues dropped low ‘n slow. Apiano! just beat Blues to D and, dropping spinnakers, both headed back to Brixham. With no true beat the cheerful piano players were in the pound seats, swapping stories and polo mints, till a change of course was signalled by the venerable RO who shall be nameless – see my blog – any way Ms M Reads ( names and sex changed to avoid any embarrassment) changed the course to miss out Z. apiano! followed the instruction verbatim and so did another Corinthian (not worthy of note as not in the Worlds Series but called Jon Thorpe) but the rest went blithely on round R to port . FOOLS.
Your correspondent is unable, nay unwilling, to report on
the shenanigans that followed but I can say that, as I was filing my copy en-route
through Torquay, I
could hear the laughter from apiano! floating across
Apiano! Boss, S Linley-Shaw , tight lipped as ever, will be filing a report to Sonata Worlds HQ in Geneva and your Sonata correspondent will be flying to Nice, on expenses, to give you the low down asap. Watch this space. St Tom watched from the point as his valiant Jack and 3 queens unravelled them selves having gone round R to port – non sailors now is the time to give snooker a last go…..
Your Sonata World’s Correspondent.
As always only the first 3 are listed
Apiano!
BluesBreaker
Toyota Yaris 1.4i ( first time in the top three – well done)
astb