Course changes 2010

Next year the courses will include racing around The Duck Island Keys. The Keys are to be commissioned by Torquay Council at an estimated cost of £13 billion - less than the Olympic Games!

The Keys will stretch in a 30 mile arc from Start Point to Dawlish Warren.

They will create a sensation in the world of Pubic Art.

The Keys will consist of 100mtr erect pinnacles of used rubber car tyres sheathed with polymers to glow in the twilight and dispense with the need for street lights in the whole of Torbay except parts of Marldon and Hele (obviously). Plans for monorail bridges linking The Keys for the Dawlish - Start - Dawlish bullet train can be seen in Brixham Town Hall from next Tuesday ask for a private viewing of the maquets. *Norman stations will be built at Dawisha nd Beesands, as predicted by I K Brunel some 200 years ago, just after the rats ate his all-leather-air-train-pipes.

A new bus route will be planned in 2020 to transport giddy passengers from the headlands to archaic tracks known as Netwrok Ail.

All Kingskerswell bypass planners will be seen leaping out of Castle Circus windows to the roar of vast crowds of well-wishers.....street bunting and doilies.. etc.

Of course this story may well be denied by the leader of the council who will blame whistle blowing.......well if telling it like it is wrong then I'm wrong ... but don't forget you heard this first on the Sonata World Series website!

*Norman architecture is characterised by Roman semicircular arches, Bird beak embellishment and massive round columns – not to be confused with Normal Foster the cult gherkin meister.